Goals Growth and Greatness

Is Fear Producing Your Reality?


Following on from last weeks post, surrounding yourself with a stadium of supporters i thought i would share an experience i had yesterday that really rammed home how important not just our supporters are but how important the ones closest to us are as well.

Have you ever lost your child in a shopping centre or even lost sight of them for a split second in a crowded area?

Yesterday we were having a lovely day enjoying a bbq out the back of Mum’s house by the river. It was dark and we all had a few drinks and really enjoying the spirit of the night.

Everything changed in an instant though when someone noticed Luke, our youngest member of the clan was missing. Luke is 2 and a half years old and just at the age of wanting to explore everything in sight.

His Mum just popped up the shops briefly and entrusted us to keep an eye on him while she was gone. It only took a few minutes of conversation before we had the realisation he was gone and we all feared the worst.

Everyone swung in to action mode, grabbing torches, running around the complex, knocking on doors, calling out Luke’s name. It was a sickly feeling walking along the river bank with a torch, fearing the worst and hoping he was somehow asleep in his bed upstairs.

It was a good 10 minutes before we got the phone call that little Luke was actually with his Mum at the shops; she made a last minute decision to take him along with her.

The collective sigh of relief filled the air as we stood there contemplating what could have been. For the past 10 minutes we were in a state of panic – inconsolable until we knew what had happened.

When things calmed down i stepped out and looked back at the situation.

It made me realise how vulnerable we are when we let our fears take over our thoughts. Isn’t it interesting to see how our mind copes with different situations. All of us were white with fear of the possibilities and allowed the myriad of worst case scenarios to control our thoughts. Panic was well and truly set in and we would have done anything to know that our Luke was safe.

Thankfully everything turned out fine but there were a few lessons we all took away that night:

* Treasure your loved ones, they are all that matter in life

* Don’t let your fears overpower your thoughts

* When in a state of panic you are at your least effective

These fears are often nothing more than figments of our imagination; quite simply, our mind is producing the chemicals in our bodies to deal with any given situation.

Fear is a primal emotion and has its place in our lives. Its important though, to keep things in context when fear sets in. I often ask myself a question when i am feeling a superficial fear that is holding me back from stepping outside my comfort zone. I simply ask, “Am i safe?” This brings home what is real in my life right now. The answer is always yes and that thought patten ensures my perception of the event does not become my reality.

Put simply my fear is False Evidence Appearing Real.

Have you had an experience where your mind produced so much fear you could not think  straight? I would love to hear your story.



posted under Purpose
4 Comments to

“Is Fear Producing Your Reality?”

  1. Avatar April 10th, 2010 at 10:34 am Sally Bath Says:

    Wow what a scary experience for you. So glad it turned out fine but I know what you mean how we can get ourselves into these situation and it does become our reality.
    I’m trying to think of a specific situation. I remember when I went skydiving..I had to totally overcome fear. It was a mental challenge but I decided I was going to do it anyway so why not just enjoy it.
    I look forward to hearing comments from others.
    .-= Sally Bath´s last blog ..Analyze Your Way To The Top Using These Five Tips =-.

  2. Avatar April 10th, 2010 at 10:36 am Darlene Davis Says:

    Yes, Matt, It’s easy for me to identify with the fear you felt looking for Luke. I lost my son, Chase, in a shopping mall some years ago. It only took 9 minutes to find him, but those were the longest 9 minutes of my life! You can’t believe the thoughts that ran through my mind in that time!

    Like your definition of fear. It usually is false evidence appearing real.

    I love your posts. You bring thoughts forward that I think about all week:)
    .-= Darlene Davis´s last blog ..Lessons From A Half Pint: Wag More, Bark Less =-.

  3. Avatar April 10th, 2010 at 11:06 am Matt Says:

    Thanks so much Sally and Darlene. Your feedback inspires me.

  4. Avatar April 10th, 2010 at 7:18 pm Linda G. Cox Says:

    I really enjoy your posts! The real fear that you were experiencing would be horrible! I love the way you can see experiences and pick up the lessons that can be learned from them.

    I don’t mean to distract from the lesson you’ve taught us but I’ve a funny ‘missing-the-kid’ story that happened to me ~ almost 20 years ago – I had 5 small children, my oldest was 7, then 5, 4, 2 and a newborn. We went to the Palmer pool for open swim. Palmer is a small town and everyone knows everyone, a very safe place, unlike the lake that you were at. (You have to know that decade was my favorite in my life – when my children were all little 🙂 I wasn’t swimming, I was holding the baby and watching the kids. The baby was being passed around the crowd of parents watching.

    It was time to go and I rounded everyone up. I went into the locker room and passed off the baby to Toni, my oldest while I helped the 2yr old get dressed. Then I motivated everyone to get their towels and swim suits and I went back to the entryway and waited while they all gathered together. Everyone came, but the baby wasn’t there! I started asking all the parents as they filed out, “Have you seen my baby?” I was feeling a little urgent, looking in everyone’s arms, waiting for my oldest child to come out of the locker room. Still asking everyone who passed, “Have you seen my baby!” I was starting to get a little desperate and even though I’m not a worrier by nature, I was nervous! Finally my oldest daughter came out of the locker room empty handed and I almost yelled at her, “Toni, have you seen Jaimi? “Mom,” she calmly said, “she’s in your arms!”
    .-= Linda G. Cox´s last blog ..Like A Mouse In My Pocket =-.

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Matt worked in the theatre industry as a lighting technician for over 15 years. Although the work was satisfying and allowed him to explore his creative talents, Matt was ruled by the need to swap his time for money to survive.

In 2005, Matt quit the theatre industry to educate himself in property investing and personal development. Since then has created his own property networking group that has over 200 members and now invests full time in property and internet marketing.

On his journey from paid employee to entrepreneur, Matt has discovered that personally developing himself and creating a winning mindset was critical to achieving any and all of his dreams and goals.

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